unstick your stories

Stories

We all have them and they have an impact on how we see ourselves, show up in relationships, and how we live our lives. Stories are powerful tools for shaping our perceptions of the world, and they can have a profound influence on our sense of self.

On the one hand, stories can be incredibly empowering. They can inspire us to dream big, take risks, and pursue our passions. They can give us a sense of purpose and direction, and help us to connect with others who share our values and aspirations.

However, stories can also be limiting. When we are exposed to negative or restrictive stories about ourselves or the world around us, they can become internalized and start to shape our self-image. We may begin to believe that we are not good enough, or that we are incapable of achieving our goals. These stories can become self-fulfilling prophecies, leading us to hold ourselves back and miss out on opportunities for growth and fulfillment.

So how can we use the power of stories to become the best versions of ourselves, rather than being held back by limiting beliefs? One approach is to become more conscious of the stories we tell ourselves and others. By examining the narratives that shape our perceptions of the world, we can begin to identify and challenge the ones that are holding us back. We can seek out new stories that align with our values and aspirations, and use them to inspire and motivate us.

When I am going to say something negative about myself I say “in the past I was ____,” or “historically, I was _____,” this way I am putting the limiting belief behind me, in my past, where it belongs. I know how important the present moment is as that is the exact location that our future blossoms from!

Another approach is to become the authors of our own stories. Rather than allowing external narratives to define us, we can take control of our own narratives and shape them in a way that reflects our true authentic selves. This may involve taking risks, pursuing our passions, and embracing our imperfections and vulnerabilities. This may also mean appreciating and acknowledging the people that you have been before and also allowing them to fade away at the same time.

I could tell you my adventures—beginning from this morning… but it's no use going back to yesterday, because I was a different person then. ~ Lewis Carroll

One time I was explaining astrology to a friend of mine, she was asking me to explain how she (an Aquarius) and I (a Cancer) were different. My simple explanation without going into Moon/Rising etc was to explain that as an air sign she has a sort of beautiful detached quality that allows her to not be offended by the words or expectations of others; me being a Cancer, a water sign who feels mostly everything and is historically sensitive, I could be offended much easier by something a friend said to me.

I use astrology as a guideline, like all divination tools they help you to see aspects of yourself you were blind to before. When I was describing this to my friend I realized that if I find myself offended I could just try to get up and out of my Cancerian mind for a moment, to transcend my own bullshit in order to have a broader perspective.

set yourself free

Let’s play pretend for a moment. What if you were not you? Not necessarily someone else, just not yourself with your past and your stories and your grievances and your pain. For a breath just allow your personality and your burdens to sink deep into the ground and allow yourself to become empty. Take a few slooooow and deeeeep breaths. And allow the self (personality / avatar) that is not the Self (soul) to sink into the earth. The ground of course will hold on to these things so you don’t have to. Now breathe from this emptiness, this unknownness, this spaciousness and see what it feels like. Do you feel burdened or stressed in the same way? Do you have the same physical discomfort in your body? Do you experience different emotions? Stay curious. What does this feel like?

Depression is your avatar telling you it's tired of being the character you're trying to play. ~ Jim Carrey

What this visualization allows us is to step outside of ourselves to see the cage we’ve built around ourselves with all of your stories. If I can consider for a second that I can be different, and my thoughts create emotions, which create hormones, which inspire actions, then by thinking may way into spaciousness, I can achieve spaciousness. By thinking myself limitless, I can achieve limitlessness.

Ultimately, the stories we tell ourselves and others have a profound impact on our sense of self and our ability to thrive in the world. By becoming more conscious of these stories and taking an active role in shaping them, we can unlock our full potential and become the best versions of ourselves!

Then one day the stories that made you vengeful, that made you powerless, that held control over you will just be chapters of an old book you read 15 years ago.

Please enjoy one of my favorite quotes from Alan Watts & Albert Camus.

Let's suppose that you were able every night to dream any dream that you wanted to dream. And that you could, for example, have the power within one night to dream 75 years of time. Or any length of time you wanted to have.

And you would, naturally as you began on this adventure of dreams, you would fulfill all your wishes. You would have every kind of pleasure you could conceive. And after several nights of 75 years of total pleasure each, you would say "Well, that was pretty great." But now let's have a surprise. Let's have a dream which isn't under control. Where something is gonna happen to me that I don't know what it's going to be. And you would dig that and come out of that and say "Wow, that was a close shave, wasn't it?"

And then you would get more and more adventurous, and you would make further and further out gambles as to what you would dream.

And finally, you would dream ... where you are now. You would dream the dream of living the life that you are actually living today. ~ Alan Watts

~

The realization that life is absurd cannot be an end, but a beginning. ~ Albert Camus

vulnerability: a superpower

Vulnerability is an essential part of the human experience. It is the state of being exposed to the possibility of harm or damage, either physically or emotionally. Vulnerability is often viewed negatively, associated with weakness or frailty. However, it is important to recognize that vulnerability can also be a source of strength and growth; a superpower.

Like most of us ‘black sheep,’ Highly Sensitive People (HSP’s), empaths and/or lightworkers, I used to think feeling my feelings so deeply and expressing my vulnerability was a curse. But it also felt inauthentic to feel things so deeply without sharing them because I longed for connection despite feeling isolated in my depression. I read somewhere (later in life) that when you’re depressed you’re actually more connected to the collective than when you’re happy. Depression will lie to you and tell you you’re alone, but in that moment of your darkest hour you’re more connected to everyone else than ever before. I think this is because we all experience pain, but not all of us are able or privileged enough to experience the highest of highs. What I have come to realize through my experiences of long term anxiety and depression throughout my teens and early 20’s is that sometimes the lowest of lows allow me to know what the highest of highs feel like. It’s like without the lows as a baseline - how would I know how high the highs get?

People who wade into discomfort and vulnerability and tell the truth about their stories are the real badasses. ~ Brene Brown

Vulnerability is often seen as a weakness or a flaw. It's something we can try to hide from others and even from ourselves. However, vulnerability can be a strength that can help us bond more deeply with others and become more resilient in the face of life's challenges. Have you ever shared something with someone who accepted and loved you despite what you shared? Remember the amount of love and gratitude and appreciation you felt for that relationship?

…the Grinch's small heart grew three sizes that day. ~ Dr. Suess

strength in vulnerability

I started to realize feeling everything so deeply wasn’t a bad thing, it connected me to more people, it made me more compassionate, patient and more understanding of what my fellow human was growing through.

This is the lesson of the Throat Chakra teaches us power through vulnerability - sharing our truth brings the people together and completes the circle. Storytelling connects us through weaving threads of dialogue and finding resonant nodes and related topics. When we share our wounds and truth, others feel more comfortable sharing, which opens hearts, expands minds, and deepens relationships.

Vulnerability is not weakness; it's our greatest measure of courage. ~ Brene Brown

The planetary alignments and retrogrades we experienced at the end of 2022 really put me into an introverted, reflective state where I was reeling from such intense unworthiness and feelings undeserving of the life I live. These emotions and feelings were so intense I was beginning to implode into myself so I decided instead of letting these emotions direct my downward spiral, I would shine a light into this darkness and share them with my friends and boyfriend instead.

As SOON as I shared my emotions they sighed, releasing their breath and the heaviness that came with it, “me too,” they said. Through sharing our vulnerability and being so honest with ourselves and each other - and supporting each other through working with our own brand of feelings, we were able to relax fully into ourselves, our truth, and each other.

Vulnerability can also be a source of strength in difficult times. When we are vulnerable, we allow ourselves to feel and process our emotions, even if they are painful. This can be difficult, but it can also help us to move through difficult experiences and come out stronger on the other side.

In order to embrace vulnerability as a superpower, we must learn to be kind to ourselves. We must recognize that vulnerability is a sign of courage and strength. We must also be willing to be patient with ourselves and with others, as this can be a slow and sometimes challenging process.

When we are vulnerable, we create deeper ties with the people around us. It requires trust, and when we are willing to share our true selves with others, we create an environment of trust and understanding.

Vulnerability; a superpower

Vulnerability can be scary. It requires us to let go of control and trust that others will not use our vulnerabilities against us. It can be difficult to be honest and open about our struggles and weaknesses, especially in a world that often values strength and independence above all else. This can be terrifying because it makes us feel exposed and open to judgment, but it can also be incredibly empowering.

Vulnerability is not winning or losing; it's having the courage to show up and be seen when we have no control over the outcome. ~ Brene Brown

By being vulnerable, we are being authentic and honest and therefore we can create deeper connections with others. We acknowledge our emotions and our limitations, we become more resilient in the face of challenges, and learn to be more compassionate to ourselves.

So, the next time you feel afraid to be vulnerable, remember that it can actually be a source of strength and power. By embracing vulnerability, we give ourselves permission to be imperfect, and we show others that it's okay to be imperfect too.

Through Vulnerability, we Alchemize our pain into a Superpower.